Stephen: "I could jump this fence."
Mary (inside the fence): "Don't try it Steve."
Stephen: "Why not, I could do it--it'd be easy!"
Mary (turning to him with my wise, old, know-it-all, face): "Because, (lifting fingers to count the ways), you would: snag on the fence, bend it down, rip your jeans, and land in the manure."
I turn back to my work and hear Steve still muttering how he could jump it easily.
A moment later, the sound of rapid heavy footfalls reach my ears. I turn just in time to see the boy jump, aaaand: 1. snag on the fence, 2. bend it down, 3. rip his jeans, and 4. land RIGHT in the manure.
I stare at him for a moment with my mature, grown-up, 'told you so,' face while he picks himself up. " I would have done it," says he, "if not for these heavy winter boots on my feet."
Today I am patching pants and rolling my eyes...